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| Dr. William Henry Cosby |
“William H. Cosby’s Admittance of Guilt”
By Glenn Peppers 7-8-2015
(The Rusty Nail in the Coffin of his Career)
I just saw a news report on Bill Cosby this afternoon, and his admitting on court transcript of purchasing Quaaludes (a tranquilizer and mood drug), and giving them to unsuspecting women in order to have sex with them. hearing this has set a sad tone and mood in me today! Right about now I am heartbroken! As are many people who’ve come along through the 1960's, 70's and 80's and even the 1990's with Bill Cosby. People from my generation grew up with him, admired him, and loved his work and accomplishments since the early to middle 1960’s!
At first, I thought this whole thing of his raping and abusing this seemingly ridiculous amount of women was all a scam in order to bring down this powerfully successful, and wealthy black man who changed the landscape of television in america just after the civil rights era, and the world by breaking the color line (and on NBC at that).
Then I thought to myself. All this is being done in effort to bring down a man who was, and still may be in the midst of putting together a Bill Cosby Television Production Company that would rival that of Oprah Winfrey and the Ted Turner’s Empire has got going. I kept thinking to myself about all these women coming out of the woodwork, seemingly out of nowhere, and at breakneck speed! “Why such an onslaught, and emergence as if all this had just happened?”
There was and still is an odd eagerness about all this that still bothers me, despite Cosby’s off handed admission or confession in a deposition done years ago. One where he admits to buying quaaludes and using them as a date rape drug! As far as the public, and possibly many of his colleagues knew, Cosby seemed to have always maintained class and dignity, and never showed any sign of being the type of person who’d take advantage of anyone! Let alone an unconscious woman! The only thing we all knew about Bill Cosby in our world is that he had always giving us some pretty interesting and endearing humor, and positive images for and of black people, and for the rest of the world!
Cosby was the first black man on television that I saw as a child who wasn't an embarrassing stereotypical clown or a buffoon! He was Chet Kincade, high school coach, and physical education teacher on the Bill Cosby Show in 1969. Before that, he was Scotty on I SPY! And he was very cool on that TV show! He and Robert Culp were partners and equals on the show. Bill Cosby was never anybody's butler or a slang talkin' Jim Crow throwback of what bigoted hollywood has always wanted black people to be viewed and depicted as! Bill Cosby had exuded class and intelligence. And it showed!
Cosby made the whole idea of black youth making collage their aspiration seem pretty darn cool! He even helped create a television show to that effect. "A Different World!" Regardless of his shortcomings, this television show still inspires black youth to go to collage; and expressly encourages them to try and attend traditionally black collage campus like, Spellman and Morehouse.
I guess what was and is so heartbreaking and disappointing to me this day was the smirky attitudes and half sniggly looks of victory some of the newscasters and other broadcasters and commentators had on their faces as they conveyed this news. Some of them intently imparted an air and a look that clearly said, "We’ve Got Him!" Not Bill Cosby the Rapist or Bill Cosby the Abuser, or Bill Cosby the Potion Pusher to unsuspecting young women. But “We’ve Got Bill Cosby” that “Damned Uppity N----R!"
From channel to channel, some of them seemed to actually revel in this once well loved man’s hard tumbling down that long bumpy ladder of shame into dishonor, humiliation and disgrace! A man who some of them clearly they never liked all along, but only tolerated throughout the years! So, how many more black people of legend in our midst do some of our most popular, and powerful media facilitators sit back and laugh and joke with other distinct black people of renown, yet hate their guts, and lay in wait for their public demise? Hmm, I wonder!
Self admission is quite tangible evidence! Its undeniable! In admitting the purchasing of knockout type drugs for the purpose of putting aspiring actresses and models unconscious in order to have sex with them, Cosby planted a firm Rusty Nail in his career coffin! Imagine, all those years and decades of positive works and accomplishments, gone! How does one live with something like that? For that matter, how did he live with what he did to all those young women, for all those years? Did he ever give any thought as to how such an experience could have ruined their lives?
The thought makes me tremendously sad. Yet I'd rather he admit to these horrible things and man up to them, then for him to try and carry on as if nothing had ever happened at all, and fool-heartedly try to make us think of him in an endearing way! My heart would never let me do that, knowing what he had done!
So I guess I’ve resigned myself to the fact that, life goes on! Heroes fall, as younger modern day heroes gain acceptance, fame and fortune, and then one day, they too will become the slick on the bottom of hollywood's shoe that they’ll soon want to scrape off! Like so many others who have broken my heart in modern media, in recent times, I am so over them in that, I'm learning much better at how to see the hero in me! And even then I’ve had to learn not to harbor unrealistic expectations concerning myself, because I too am human!
Like any of you, I have faults and cockamamie shortcomings, and I just might not be the person (in your eyes) that YOU may think I am or should be. Yep, news flash folks!... We all have shortcomings that would shame us terribly! The only difference is, the whole world isn't viewing our lives coming apart at the seams, under the microscope of a TMZ /ET tabloid world; and on 24 news outlets like CNN, and MSNBC, etc!
So, where do I (we) go from here? Where does Doctor Bill Cosby go from here? Where will all those damaged victims of his go from here? Hopefully through some kind of therapy or healing process! Maybe Cosby’s strange admittance of guilt is now some form of closure for them and himself. Sure they're angry. Heck I am angry too! For that matter, I think we're all angry, anybody whose enjoyed Cosby’s work in any way over these many years!
Come to think of it! Given our lifetime of love and devotion. We (the many fans of Bill Cosby) have been abused as well! In a sense, Cosby has ravaged the minds of all those who loved him! In a manner of speaking, he's taken advantage of our gullible nature to love those wonderfully colorful images he’s painted for us! We’re victims too in that we are prey to the illusions and images we see on our TV screens, and in most all modern audio and video media that we see and hear everyday. And that illusion is that, rich, beautiful and talented people on TV, the record business, the movies and in sports are PERFECT People! There is no such thing!
Knowingly or not, Cosby played us all for fools by portraying this wholesome, Jello Pudding Pop/Everybody's Dad who (as he said on one of his albums) let's his own children eat cake for Breakfast kinda guy. When all the while he was wrestling with a terrible demonic style Jekyll & Hyde persona, lurking in the shadows of his mind, going, Hey, hey, hey! Fooling the hell out of all of us!
And the thing I find saddest for all his fans in dealing with the memory, and the very idea of Bill Cosby the abuser, here and now is this; There's nothing illegal what he did to us! There is nothing illegal in pulling at our heart strings, and our emotions through comedy, or producing great television shows and movies, or having an infectious personality on talk shows, and in concert and on funny comedy albums. So our long distance Mind Screw’ed hearts doesn't get a chance at any legal closure, or get a trial against Bill Cosby for breaking our hearts. This inner hurt will have to be something that we'll have to resolve within ourselves! I’ve said it many many times before. A quote by John Lennon. “Aspire not to meet your idols, for they’ll always disappoint you!” I can’t express to you how true this saying is!
As I mentioned, I have rediscovered the hero within me! There’s a song by the English 1980’s punk rock band, Spandau Ballet that comes to mind. The song, "GOLD!" Part of the Lyrics are as follows!...
“GOLD”
“Gold (gold)
Always believe in your soul
You've got the power to know
You're indestructible
Always believe in, that you are
Gold (gold)”
One good thing has come out of this for me since this first came to light months ago. There comes a strange empowerment through the pain of losing a hero (or heroes)! It brings you back down to basics! It puts you in touch with self! You will then find that when you love God and yourself, you’re indestructible! Something I’ve actually known all along, but sadly had to be reminded of it! When you get to this point, this is where you are supposed to be in life! In knowing this truth, there will be nothing you can’t do! There should be no more important elements in your life than, God the creator who fashioned you. Your family and of course yourself!
So my mission is simple. I will pray for healing in this moment! Healing for all those who were abused by Bill Cosby, and for Bill Cosby himself. You can only pray for a man who has in his lifetime gained the whole world, and in his twilight years, stands a chance of losing his mortal soul! I say Let the healing start, for everyone!
By Glenn Peppers 7-8-2015
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